I CARVE INTO MY HEART THE SINS AND I LIVE ON DYING

a-yo, Carin here! 20yo from Gothenburg, Sweden. (￣▽￣)ノ I post: gore, DIR EN GREY, Ito Junji, tattoos, blood, cats, mental illness, morbid/dark/rock/gothic fashion, murder, ww2, pandas, nazi, BIG BANG, zombies, Die Antwoord, asian fashion, self harm, popcult icons, travel, Takato Yamamoto, skulls, Japan, GD&TOP, art, EDs, Alice Glass, piercings, 2NE1, nude women, nerdy shit, kpop, self & own life, underground popcult. ect... ★ ★ ☆ ☆

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I’ve not been feeling very well over the last couple of weeks… To say the least… It’s embarrassing I still can’t get rid off the habit to cut myself, when I’m in too deep into the downward spiral of depression and anxiety. It’s embarrassing that my boyfriend will see these, however much I want to hide them, when we reunite in 2 weeks. It’s pathetic not to be able to handle and take care of myself when I’m 20 years old and live on my own. I hope my boyfriend won’t be too disappointed. Because I already am.

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gotta watch the second Gantz movie now

nothing better to do anyway

rain is pouring down outside and I woke up at 5:30pm today haha

Wonderful weather~ (Taken with Instagram at Kärrtorp)

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it’s fucking 7am

I can’t sleep to save my own life

watching Gantz all night to “cure” the insomnia didn’t help, but it was an awesome waste of time

wtf just happened

went from insanely happy to total anxiety and self-hatred in about 30 minutes

please kill me what the hell is going on

just ugh

I feel like I’m becoming someone I don’t wanna be at all somehow

and like all my ~best friends~ are starting to hate me

and then those photos my aunt’s husband took of me today

I am so fat again that I might as well just go jump in front of a train

can I just disappear? please?

did I forget to take my meds today??

holy shit BINGLE BINGLE is fucking perfect

so fucking happy when I finally heard the FULL VERSION of STILL ALIVE (the song)! thank you my wonderful BIGBANG for actually making it a full song

it’s still one of the best songs on the new album and I hated how short it was on the regular edition

thank god for special editions

How do I sober???? Ugh, been out with friends drinking for the past 8h. Finally home. Drunk outta my mind. Good night. It’s 5:07.

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Been looking for my #cat all day, and I just found her chilling under my chair (=___=) I give up! (Taken with instagram)

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okay sexting wasn’t as awkward as I thought

once I got over my nervousness (is that a word??)

ok just gotta delete lots of awkwardly sexy nude photos of myself, from my phone, now so they’ll never be seen again

poor bf, how can he even jack off to thise photos

aaaah I don’t wanna see those photos again

ASDFGHJKL le boyfran wants me to sext him again

I cannot

I dunno how

this is fucking awkward

am I supposed to get this nervous about sexting after being with him for more than 6 months?

It’s not easy being this pretty~ seriously in love with my beauty supplies… (Taken with instagram)

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Maybe I should cut my hair soon? (Taken with Instagram at Kärrtorp)

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fuckfuckfuck

damn boyfriend, come back from China now I can’t take it anymore

What is a hat-shelf? We’ve got a cat-shelf! (Taken with Instagram at Kärrtorp)

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